Walking with mental illness

I started going to counseling through school. But because there were so many other situations that had happened. The real reason I was there seemed to be the only thing I didn't want to talk about. I was scared to tell someone that I heard people in my head. I was a little confused because since I was a very little girl I am sensitive. Meaning, I knew when "bad" energy was near me. Rooms or homes I could sense a presence. I had an instance when I was sleeping and "someone" sat on my bed. The smell of burning leaves. I have always been very intuitive of others emotions. Which only made mine worse. Still to this day I can walk in a house and tell you if "spirits" roam there.  So I was confused on whether the "spirits" were talking to me or what. So when the counseling started it was all pretty much crap. No one believed that I was just "going through something".  I felt like all my happiness and love and anything positive was sucked out of me in a matter of minutes. This is during the 80s when you were locked up for mental illness. I didn't know anything about it. I was a daddys' little girl. I was so worried to let my dad down. No one knew how to help me including me.
I understand today as a 41 year old woman that my parents didn't do wrong by what was about to happen. Its just they didn't understand either. It took me a long time to not hate my parents. But to only find forgiveness, complete forgiveness. Sometimes we feel better if we have someone to blame. So grab your coffee and a sandwich. I'm going to take you to the into the shadows.